Finbarr Kiely: Loafers Bar, Homosexuality, Decriminalisation.

Finbarr Kiely: Loafers Bar, Homosexuality, Decriminalisation.

Stories and memories of LGBT life in Cork City and County.

Finbarr Kiely describes life in Cork for a gay man through the early ‘70s, the ‘90s up to the present. He recalls first realising that he is gay and how he blends this part of his personal life with social and professional lives. He relates stories of the gay cultural scene in Cork, well known bars, characters and events. He discusses decriminalisation and, briefly, gay marriage.

11 November 2014

CFP_SR00534_kiely_2014

Cork, Ireland, 1970s-2010s

CFP_SR00502_kay_2014;
CFP_SR00516_browne_2014;
CFP_SR00518_dee_2014;
CFP_SR00519_casey_2014;
CFP_SR00521_mccarthy_2014;
CFP_SR00532_davis_2014;
CFP_SR00534_kiely_2014;
CFP_SR00547_curtin_2015;
CFP_SR00548_mcallister_2015;
CFP_SR00549_neville_2015;
CFP_SR00555_whelan_2015;
CFP_SR00556_lynch_2015;
CFP_SR00558_doherty_2015;
CFP_SR00561_kerrigan_2015;
CFP_SR00576_odonnabhain_2016;

Cork Folklore Project Audio Archive.

English

Sound

1 .wav File

44min 44sec

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24bit / 48kHz

FK I was actually doing a line with a girl in the early eighties and do you know even when I was with her I still thought I would prefer to be with a guy and that kind of relationship broke down and I didn’t do any more about chasing women after that and eventually I got the courage up to go over there with Ned and then I think from there on I started accepting it and, accepted it in my own head anyway that this head wasn’t going to change like you know its not going to go away at this stage, em, still didn’t really tell anybody other than the guy that I went over with, but one night then I suppose two or three years later I was living a secret life going in there for a while but I told a good friend of mine at the time, he was a married man, much older than me with a family.  I told him one night, it was around Christmas, his family had gone to bed and we were still having a few drinks and I told him by the way and even authorised that he could tell everyone the following day if he wanted so it got out around that particular circle eventually.  I never told anybody at work as such except one fellow and that was pure accident, em, I used to work down west Cork at the time but I lived in the city but this one character he used to like to come up to Cork for a few drinks, wouldn’t say every week now but every second week and he tried to make a point of meeting me and we used to always meet on Douglas Street, the Gables generally at the time and eh, I’d want to get down to Loafers before closing time do you know just to see who was around, whatever, he used go nightclubbing the nights he would come up, stay in Cork for the night and go nightclubbing.  I was always escaping from him around eleven o clock and em, one night he says to me, em, Fi (possibly short for Finbarr) where do you go now, you always go away around this time, where do you go?  I’m dying to know, ah I said I just go down the road to some other pup down there.  Which one do you go to and maybe I had a few pints that night and I said well Dennis actually its fucking Loafers and I told him straight out then and he got the biggest land of his life, em, he more or less said he thought I would be the last person in the world to be gay but anyway he said you know what I always wanted to see what that pub is like can I come down with you, so he actually came down with me for a drink that night.

DC Ah cool!

FK And em I still meet the same guy, I’m gone out of that firm nine years now maybe and he’s gone out of it even before me but we still meet regularly for a drink, well when I say regularly maybe once a year, twice a year max and he never told anyone else down in work so as far as I’m concerned work never knew but I was always, I worked in west Cork, lived in Cork city so the two lives didn’t clash you know, I kept my social life completely separate from work life so as far as I know nobody down there knew, for as long as I was there now maybe I’m wrong maybe they did know and they were just been polite you know as I’m a good actor you know.  I worked with another fellow in Cork, em, up to three years ago and god he was every day he’d be telling me about his conquests for the night with different various women whatever, I met the guy there last year for a drink and em, there was another member with us who he had got to know we used to meet kind of regularly and he got to know another gay character with me and the gay fellow was going away one night and my friend says where are you going now and he said I’m going down to Loafers and he said uh and when he was gone the other fellow asked me I never knew he was gay and I says sure you never asked him, I suppose not he said, by the way I am too he said whaaaat…(laughter) now a week later I met him again or two weeks later and as it turned out he ended up coming back here and initiated some sexual activity.